Many of us try to get a fresh start in a new year by making resolutions that will improve or enhance our lives. We make a valiant effort with the high hope that the changes we make will last. Then, life happens.
There is a way to get in control of our lives and make it last though. I finally got through the “been there, done that” dilemma myself, however it did take some rethinking to make my changes stick.
One of the first things I realized was that I needed a valid reason to make a change. I needed a worthwhile purpose.
A purpose could be anything from wanting to improve our health in order to live longer to wanting to keep our room neat so we”d feel better in it. Whatever it is, there needs to be a meaningful reason you want something.
For years, this one friend of mine had wanted to start a new career endeavor. She had made a few attempts to get started in the past but never fully carried through with her plans. Then, once she established why she wanted to do this, what effect it would have on her life, and what benefits it would have to others, she went into high gear to launch her new career. See, she had the driving force to take off — purpose.
How many of you know someone who wanted to quit smoking? This one guy I know tried so many times he was at the point of feeling completely hopeless about it. I asked him why he wanted to quit smoking and he said because he wanted to be healthier. That”s nice, but why did he want to be healthier? To live longer? At first, yes. But it wasn”t until he ascertained he had a more unselfish motive that finally got him to stop lighting up: he wanted to do it for others who cared about him so he would be around longer–for them.
That purpose carried great weight. So, I believe if we want something a certain way, we also need a meaningful reason to have it that way.
Isn”t it all too common that we also find ourselves stuck in a situation we don”t want? When we get into a rut, it”s because we didn”t put our attention on the important things. In focusing less on the tangible and more on the fulfillment of things you value, you”ll achieve a sense of balance.
To create an ideal lifestyle for ourselves, we need to structure our life so that we have time to do those things that have purpose for us. But as I said, first we need to determine what our aims are that get us from the place we are to a final destination where we want to be.
Some tips for getting our lives in balance include:
1. Change priorities. Priorities should encompass family relations, personal enrichment, health, pursuing passions, working toward long-range goals.
2. Change the way you operate. Adjust your normal operating basis to fit in your new priorities. This could be done by segmenting your day and week with a routine agenda. Include the time you devote to work, to family, to personal leisure activities and friends, to your health, toward your passions and long-term goals.
3. Plan your schedule daily. Refer to those activities that get you from where you are now to where you want to be.
4. Create a time plan with a master list and daily list. Limit the number of things to accomplish in one day.
5. Focus on your lifelong passions and start to really pursue them. Life is more fulfilling when you”re doing those things that bring you joy. Direct your energies on doing more activities that are in sync with your purposes.
6. Do less what you don”t like and do more what you do like. Many things you don”t enjoy doing can be delegated, so make a list and see what you can enlist another person to do, or hire someone to do it.
7. Learn to say “no” to things that don”t align with your purpose. Match time and resources to the priorities you”ve chosen.
8. Don”t make work the center of your universe. Step off the work highway temporarily to regain a sense of balance.
9. Make time for yourself. Do those things that comfort you — a bath, a walk, reading.
10. Keep agreements you”ve made with yourself.
When you really know what I”m saying, you”ll find that it”s not so much about managing time to achieve our goals and pursue our passions. It”s more about managing ourselves. It”s about knowing what we want, and why we want it.
Happy new year. May things never be the same.
