I was reading this morning that in November 2004, Congress approved all the $16.2 BILLION dollars NASA sought for its 2005 budget. Can you even fathom that much money? What makes me particularly surly this morning after reading that piece of “Space: the Final Frontier” news is that I did so with a sinus infection that could kill a herd of elephants, a pod of Killer Whales, and the population of Costa Rica. I have been fighting this infection for the past three weeks.
So I am thinking at this point that, hey, $16.2 BILLION is a heck of a lot of loot for NASA to crash probes into planets and then send another one to try to find the one that crashed (costing $158 million dollars) to take pretty pictures of the debris field. I am not making this up. [1]
How much, I wonder, is the U.S. federal government spending to fight the sinus infections that torture me every year during May and have done so all my life? The thing is that if anyone knows he isn’t telling. Does this smell (as if I could smell anything at this point) like a cover-up to you?
I have been trying to find out how much the U.S. spends on sinus infection research each year. I have written the National Institutes of Health, all the “Sinus Central”, “Aren’t Sinuses Fun”, and “Sinuses-R-Us” web sites as well as the makers of the most popular sinus medications in the U.S. You know whatno one is answering my question! All I get is silence!
“Let Doug stew in his infected sinus juices.” I can hear them saying while laughing maniacally through clear nasal passages!
However, I have learned many things from the web sites I have been reading. One is that under normal conditions, your sinuses produce one quart a day of “mucus”–which is really a polite word for what we know it is REALLY called–More on that later.
Let me make this point: I am sure that with this sinus infection I have been producing a quart of “mucus” multiplied to the power of infinity and beyond each hour of the day! I am suffering with no relief in sight. God help me!
Another thing that I’ve learned is that in America, chronically infected sinuses affect more than 37 million of its citizens each year.
“An estimated 37 million Americans each year suffer from sinusitis, an inflammation or infection of the sinus cavities that prevents mucus from draining properly. The blockage can cause headache; pain and pressure in the forehead, jaw, cheeks and teeth; swelling of the eyelids and tissues around the eyes; a loss of smell; and a stuffy nose. It can even cause earaches, neck pain and deep aching at the top of the head, according to the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases.” [2]
I want to know two things.
1. How much of NASA’s Crash-A-Probe-Into-Planet 16.2 BILLION dollars budget could be diverted into a Let-Us-Cure-Sinus-Infections Project?
2. Why won’t any one tell me IF indeed there is money for infected sinus research?
I am going to start a foundation called S.N.O.T. (I told you I would get to that word, didn’t I?) This stands for Scientific Nasal Obstructive Technology.
S.N.O.T. is going to dedicate itself to going after some, if not all, NASA’s yearly budget. We must prevail. We have suffered too long!
Don’t misunderstand me. I am all for space exploration. I really am. I would love to have starships, transporters, phasers, Vulcans, and food replicators. But one doesn’t spend the rent money on lottery tickets when there are hungry mouths at home to feed. Do you get my point? Can America afford NASA?
Stand up you Sinus Suffers (and future members of S.N.O.T.) and scream a hale and hearty NO!
[1] Has orbiter found NASA’s lost Mars Polar Lander?
[2] Sleepless Nights? Could be Sinus Trouble By Karen PallaritoHealthDay Reporter
Doug Bower is a freelance writer and book author. His most recent writing credits include The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, The Houston Chronicle, The Philadelphia Inquirer, and Transitions Abroad. He lives with his wife in Guanajuato, Mexico. His new book Mexican Living: Blogging it from a Third World Country can be seen at
