It was late, I had put off going to the Software Convention till the last minute. I just had to watch my favorite show on TV,
“S-Files”. Its that episode where the Computer Salespeople all turn into Pod People and ,well never mind. Its really scary!
So I”m driving down the lonely one lane road from my house to the Convention. Its dark and the shadows are creepy, I”ll never watch S-Files again, I swear!
I pull into the parking lot, the convention is being held in the old YMCA. Geez, its dark, only 1 parking lot light and its flickering on and off. As I walk up to the entrance, I remember the old story about how, back in the Dot.Com days, when they tanked, the building was used as a makeshift morgue, to hold all the bodies of the CEOs who committed suicide.
I get this really creepy feeling on the back of my neck as I go in,oh, its just a Linux software salesman at the first booth. Is it my imagination or are his eyes glowing?
I head to the registration desk to get a program. I see the place is kinda empty, guess cause its so late. Well, I”m here to see who is offering the latest demos and what kind of freebies I can score.
The front booths are usually the big sellers and they never give away freebies or demos. So I head to the back, hmmm, the lights back here are terrible! Here”s a booth, Anti-Spyware 4 U.
The salesman shuffles up to me and says “Please take a demo of our new product”. I look at it, it says this is the latest greatest software to combat Spyware. I take the CD out of the plain paper cover and look at the Logo. Its just a plain shiny cd? Wow I can see myself in it I remark. “We spared no expense” a voice says behind me, making me jump. I didn”t even know he was behind me. Wait, I should have seen him behind me in the reflection off the CD.
I gotta be imagining things I say to myself. I ask the salesman for a brochure about their other products and as he hands it to me, our fingers brush each others. Jeez! His fingers are as cold as ice! Well, he is a salesman after all.
I thank him and head off to the other booths, seeing that I”ve gotten here too late after all, everybody is leaving. I decide to swing by the refreshments table to see if I can at least get a drink and some cookies. It sure is dark in here I think again as I come up to the table. As I scan the table, a little old lady comes up and asks me if Id like any milk and cookies. Yes Mam I reply. She hands me a little plate with cookies and paper cup of something white. I assume its milk, but its so dark in here! And there seems to be a fog or steam on the surface of the milk. Well beggars cant be choosers I think to myself as I thank her. She gives me a freaky cackling laugh as I turn away, stunned I turn back around and to my Horror, there is no-one there! Where in blazes did she go ?
I”m outta here my mind screams to me as I head for the door at a ever faster walk. In a minute I”m in my car with the doors locked and the engine warming up. Whew, That was the strangest Convention I”ve ever seen.
All the way home I”ve got a death grip on the wheel, just waiting for something to jump out of the shadows. Like a IBM salesman, now that would be scary!
If only I had known the other horrors that awaited me!
I breathe a sigh of relief as I close and lock the living room door behind me. Still shaking my head I head over to my Puter to try out this latest and greatest Anti-Spyware Software. As it boots, I get a message to disable my own Anti-Spyware program. I thing this odd, but I remember reading somewhere online that some programs can conflict with others so I comply. After a few seconds I get a message that the new Program is installed and it needs to connect to get possible updates.
So I get online and let it do its thing. A reboot is needed it says
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