Today was the first birthday party of the school season. Everyone at the party was fairly new because all of our kids are in kindergarten so no one really had the advantage over anyone else. Everyone was great at introducing themselves and meeting each other.

At one point the host of the party walked by and asked me: “is there anyone you don’t know?” I laughed because I’ve lived here for 1 month, and everyone is new to me! But a few of the gals noticed that I was introducing everyone to each other and they seemed to be impressed. They said they were going to have to take a class to learn how to remember names and I told them that I taught one! At first they thought I was joking, but then I told them that I really DID teach communication skills, and it’s actually EASY.. if you just know how.

I realized a LONG time ago that remembering peoples’ names is definitely a skill worth learning! It’s something that other people admire and it will be at least ONE “thing” that will help people remember YOU.

I told the ladies that the easiest way to remember someone’s name is to repeat it a few times within the context of the conversation. One lady said that she’d FORGET the name even before she would even get to SAY the name again! I told her that it’s perfectly fine to touch the person on the arm, look in their eyes, and ask what their name was again! This way they’ll know you’re sincere and TRYING to remember their name.

The conversation can be sprinkled with questions and using the name during the question process is easy! “Sue, it’s nice to meet you! Now, who is your child? Ahh.. yes.. And Sue, is your husband here?”

Another GREAT way to remember everyone’s name is to introduce anyone new you met to someone else. That way you get to say his or her name once again and it’ll remain fresh in your mind.

No telling whether I’ll remember everyone’s name the next time I see them if I don’t practice seeing their names in my mind now, but from what I can see, this group is worth getting to know. The people I met today were interesting, charming and memorable.

And I’m happy that I know how to remember names, because now, I can focus on getting to know THEM, and not just their names!

Contact mary at

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Mary Gardner, The Charisma Coach! is an Executive Communications Consultant and Trainer. She works with, coaches and trains individuals, sales teams, executives, and celebrities. She owned and operated one of the first coaching institutions on the east coast, CCI, in NYC, Philly and NJ. Mary has appeared on ABC’s 20/20 and has self published a book on public speaking. Mary is married to Sway and is mommy to Jeremy 5, and lives in Orlando, FL.

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